Boo!

What will you be doing on October 31 --  Dressing up for trick-or-treating?  Bobbing for apples or drinking smoky punch from a cauldron?  If you want to be truly traditional, make sure there is a bonfire around; but please, keep the authenticity in check and don’t sacrifice any animals.  That’s what the Druids would do 2000 years ago as they celebrated their New Year’s Eve with sacred bonfires.  They also believed that the veil between heaven and earth, between the living and the dead, was at its thinnest on this night - thus all the ghosts ringing your doorbell.

We start spending more time in the dark now, and a bonfire would be welcome.  Christmas lights will soon follow the jack o’lantern candles, bringing comfort and a feeling of wellbeing to the peak of this dark period.  And of course, between times we will celebrate our good harvest with some turkey and turnips.  

I think someone knew what he was doing as the holidays of feasting and light were being scheduled. It’s no fun being stuck in the house in the dark, especially with the cost of lamp oil these days! 

So ignite the fire and bake a pumpkin pie and start untangling the strands of Christmas lights.  Keep the darkness at bay for as long as possible.  Soon enough the world will turn and the sun will increase its time with us.  And get your hands out of the Halloween candy.  That’s for the ghosts!

John & I Figured It Out!

Q:  What is the meaning of Life?

A:  Love

(Seems John Lennon was right, after all.)

I’m not talking about People Magazine kind of love, although that is included.  I’m talking about the Ten Commandments, Yamas and Niyamas kind of love. Love your neighbor.  Love yourself.  Take care of your body.  Take care of your neighbor.  Don’t take what is not yours; in fact, give freely what is yours.  Give thanks.  Look up.  Give thanks again.

Open your heart, follow your heart, trust in your heart.  Send thoughts of love to that which challenges you (in yoga, we use the word “challenging”  instead of “freakin’ hard”). The love will bounce right back to you, multiplied.  Pour love (passion, hard work) into your career and you will be rewarded.  Spread love in your community through service and maybe the word “challenging” will disappear from your vocabulary.

Love is a feeling.  Love is lighter than air and brighter than the sun.  It is contentment and excitement rolled into a heart-shaped package and tucked inside your ribcage.  It echoes and reverberates and spreads and ripples out into the world.  The more happiness and excitement - Love - you feel, the further those ripples travel.  The further they travel, the more people they touch.  The more people touched by your love, the more love will be created and moved into the world.  Love is the answer.

Truth or Dart?

Now that we have all been using our “Impeccable Words”, practicing Satya + Ahimsa (truthfulness and non-harming), and are expert at using our words to convey love and concern rather than hurt or dismay, it’s time to move on to another issue.  Gossip.  It is argued that gossip is healthy, that it is a natural form of communication and a way to move information around a community.  Perhaps; but I think that the term Gossip has accrued negative connotations, and that we “gossip” the bad stuff and “share” the good.  So share away!  Spread the success of your neighbor’s children, compliment your yoga teacher in front of the whole class, bring the joy of a new baby to your friends at Starbucks.  When a dubious thought bubbles to the surface, give it the test:  Is it true? Is it kind? Then - the real litmus test for gossip - is it necessary?  

Most importantly, remember the power of I'm sorry.  We all make slips of the tongue or get caught up in gossip, and the best way to get out of such a mess is to apologize.  Love means never neglecting to say I’m sorry. 

"I hear she practices some weird religion!"

Use Your Words (Wisely)

Don Miguel Ruiz* has written about five “agreements” that you might make with yourself in order to live your highest life.  The first is Be Impeccable With Your Word.  Ruiz suggests we speak with integrity, that words not be used to speak against oneself  or others, and that we use the power of our words in the direction of truth and love.  

Let’s concentrate on speaking the truth.  If the truth will be painful to someone or cause hurt feelings, couple honesty with kindness.  When I took my Reiki training, my teacher told us to ask ourselves these questions before we spoke:  Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?  Be careful not to hide behind “the truth” in order to deliberately hurt someone.  Announcing out loud that someone’s butt looks big may be true, but it is neither kind nor necessary.  

This doesn’t mean we need to sugar-coat everything we say. Using thoughtfulness and love, we can learn how to get a painful truth across to someone.  In yogic terms, I would say practice Satya, truthfulness, with a generous helping of Ahimsa, non-harming.  Here are my suggestions, and I hope you’ll comment with some of your own.

Notice when someone tells a truth so gently that the person hearing it is grateful for the words and not offended.  The speaker probably used body language, too, such as a smile or a gentle touch, to soften the words.  Emulate that skill.

Begin with a positive statement.  Gush for a moment, then say your piece.   “Your dinner parties are so entertaining, and the food is impeccable.  I feel uncomfortable, however, when you talk about “crazy Canadians”, since my mom is from Canada.”

And about someone’s butt looking big in her dress:  Unless she’s meeting the President for a televised event, who cares!  

*www.miguelruiz.com