Sunday, June 24, 2012

Follow that Firefly!

In the winter, things seem to plod along at a soothing, repetitious pace. I like that! An unexpected change is welcome for its infrequency, and the quick return to the regularly scheduled program brings satisfaction.

In the summer, all bets are off.  Kids are home from school -- an even more glaring change for me these days since some of mine are away at college during the school year -- and the schedule is different every day. I no longer have the excuse of it being a school day to keep the family tucked safely in the house; they scatter and vanish, returning only to grab a bathing suit. Are they using sunscreen, have they eaten their vegetables? Are they hydrating?

And food. I shop, then a horde of locusts sails through and the cupboards are bare and the dishwasher is full and who left a peanut butter knife on the counter again? I swear I put six of those away every afternoon. Popsicles and watermelons chill next to the Hershey bars in case a s'mores craving hits. Meals are haphazard and mostly grilled; sometimes there's a crowd at the table and the next day it's only me and my husband.

Oh, who am I kidding.  I love this too! Spinning summer days flash by in a daze of color and motion. The summer is short and fast, and finally there is an excuse to gobble that ice cream cone in sixty seconds flat. Pockets of calm and togetherness, like today as the girls and I hung out by the pool, reminding ourselves about how they used to make me pull them by their feet through the water, and stand with my legs apart so they could courageously swim between them. They teased me about not wanting to get my hair wet (yikes, I am getting old!) and wearing a swim suit with a skirt (it's cute! I swear!).

And in a minute it will be gone with the last flash of a firefly's butt.

Monday, June 18, 2012

Salute the Sun


How full is your glass?  This week we celebrate the summer solstice, the longest day of the year. As I reminded my yoga class of this upcoming day, someone responded, “Oh, I hate the summer solstice. It means the days are going to start getting shorter.” 

Yipes!

What other wonderful things do we dismiss as being negative because it is bringing about a future change? Do we cry at our child’s eighth grade graduation through dread of having a high schooler? Do we lament our first grey hair because now we are old? Do we skip a milestone celebration because we don’t want to think back on happier/better/younger times?

Don’t miss a celebration NOW because of a fear that is in the future. Enjoy the long day. Enjoy the sweet summer nights. Eat a fresh-picked tomato (it’s lunchtime and I’m hungry . . .) And watch the news on Wednesday to see if you can catch my daughter and me Surya Namaskar-ing our heart-centers out with a few other folks (like 1500) in New York’s Times Square. Woo hoo, longest day of the year!!
Abby doing Camel
Yoga is so fun with a crowd!


Monday, June 11, 2012

Take it from Mae


I know I have blogged about this before, but it bears repeating: Eliminate all negative words from your vocabulary. Now. And double up your efforts when talking to yourself. 

Don’t worry if you slip up, because you have a backspace key so you can correct yourself. If you forget your kindness resolution and kick yourself in the butt (you yogis can literally do that, I know!), send a quick shout out to the universe that you take it back, that you actually meant to pat yourself reassuringly on the back. Then continue on your Positively Charming way.

When office chitchat turns snarky, ask yourself, “Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?” If you have to answer No to one of these questions, it’s probably time to change the subject. (Try talking about food – everyone loves food, and it’s very distracting, plus it’s true, kind and necessary!)

There is no need to be mean to your self or to others. It just makes everyone cranky. Take a tip from Aibileen (to Mae Mobley via K. Stockett in The Help), and repeat to yourself and others:  “You is kind, you is smart. You is important.”  And I’ll add, “You is loveable.”

Sunday, June 3, 2012

The &*!#$% Scenic Route Again


I was driving with my daughter recently, and twice I uttered an expletive (I know! I could hardly believe it myself!).  The second time I added some mutterings about being mad at myself for being so absentminded and stupid.  My lovely child looked at me and said, "Mom, it's not like you to talk bad abut yourself."  So I took a deep breath, and stopped talking. It would have been nice if I'd been able to give myself a pep talk, but it had been one of those days and saying nothing seemed the best course.

We all have "those days", when nothing you do turns out the way you want it to, or when it seems like everything you touch turns to lead instead of gold.  I was lucky someone who loved me was around to pull me up short and remind me that trash-talking myself would not make anything better. So often we continue to berate ourselves until we've dug ourselves in so deep it's hard to climb up again, and we begin to believe our own negative propaganda.

I should listen to my own advice more often, because I am famous in my house for saying things like, "Sweetie, you can do that mad or you can do it happy." It's so easy to moan and kvetch about something or someone, but that just drags you down into a ditch, and it gets damp and lonely in there. Be your own best friend and remind yourself that you are great, and terrific, and even though you make mistakes, you are still perfect. Because if being perfect meant never making mistakes, perfection would be undesirable -- after all, making mistakes, taking missteps, and trying new things are what teach us, and we all want to continue to learn.

So I will continue to learn that even though I forget where I'm going and have to make several u-turns on the road, I am gaining knowledge about the byways and seeing neighborhoods I never knew existed.  The scenic route! Perfect.