It’s All in Your Head

I love the placebo effect; the fact that if you believe enough in something, it becomes true. A doctor can give you a pill and convince you it will help your condition and although the pill is made of sugar, it really works!  Then the minute you are told the pill is a fake, your symptoms return.   It was “all in your head”. 

There are things going on in the world today – your own world and the collective World – that are dismaying and possibly depressing.  Decide to join those low vibrations and you will be dismayed and depressed.  How helpful will you be in that state? Not much.   If you take the path of joy and energy, simply decide to rise above the pain and feel good, then you can take the bull by the horns and do what is needed to make the world a better place. 

It’s okay if it’s all in your head, because your brain is the boss of your body and it’s your body that leads the charge.  Find what it is that makes you rise above yourself and go do it.  Yoga, service, walking in the woods. (Sorry, Margaritas are not on the list!).  Get yourself ready to make a difference, and then take the first step. You probably won’t be in a position to broker world peace, but I bet you can make your grumpy neighbor smile!

Let it go to your head.

New Jersey Dreamer

I have a great idea!  It came to me in a dream.  It involves lots of work, and some money capital, but I just know it will make us a million.  Of course I want you to be my partner!  You and I work so well together; remember the PTA fundraiser when I developed the idea for the fashion show, and you got all the models together and talked the stores into donating clothes and found that perfect venue?  People still compliment me on that.  This new venture may be a little more complicated, but I know you can do it.  Here, I wrote it down as soon as I woke from the dream; call me when you are ready to go to market and we’ll figure out your share of the profits.  I’m thinking 70/30.  No, I get the 70, of course.  

Without the idea, what is there?

A good idea lands in your lap.  Just came out of nowhere! Maybe a rumor of a job opening in another department, maybe a tune keeps running through your head, perhaps you tasted a delicious cookie you just know would be made perfect by the addition of a little allspice.  Thank your lucky stars, now you can get a better job/write a pop hit/be the next Mrs. Fields!  It’s fate, kismet, karma, (cue Julie Andrews) “there must have been a mo-ment . . . of good”. 

Weeks go by.  You didn’t get the job, you forgot the song, and you haven’t finished reading Mrs. Field’s biography. What went wrong?  It seemed a sure thing.

Oh.  Well, that.  But I was waiting for someone to come over and offer me the job; they know I’m just sitting here being wasted in accounting.  And I didn’t have the right music paper to put down the notes for that song, and it wouldn’t look right on notebook paper.  My oven is broken so I couldn’t test the recipe, and now I can’t remember if it had chocolate chips or butterscotch ones.  I always have such bad luck.

TAKE THE STEP! (Yes, I’m yelling in capital letters).  When an idea falls into your lap it is kismet, but you need to marry it with some action. Apply for the job, write the song, bake the cookie.  Then follow up with the appropriate next action.  Then the next, and the next and the next.  Dreams can come true, but only with help from you.  Not your friend (unless it’s a true partnership).

Dream it, do it.  

The Good, the Bad, and the Indifferent

What am I searching for?  When will I be happy, and what will bring about this happiness?  Why does that guy have it all and I don’t?  How do I know I am on the right path? Where do I look for guidance?  Who What Where When WHY?

We search for answers, and for clues that things are as they should be.  A raise at work signals you are doing a good job.  A hug from your teen shows you are connected to your child.  A smile from a stranger affirms that you are connected to the world.  So does it follow that no raise this year means your performance was poor; the cold shoulder from your high schooler proves you are a failure as a parent; someone letting the door bang in your face means that the outside world doesn’t even notice you?

Here is something to consider:  Everything is neutral.  There is no good, no bad, there just Is.  Allowing salary to dictate worth as a person would mean that the Wall Street guy is a better person than the Visiting Nurse who takes care of your aunt.  Each is doing important work, and their value cannot be known by their weekly paychecks.  The guy who rushed by you in the doorway wasn’t slamming the door in YOUR face, he was simply unaware of you, for reasons of his own.  And don’t get me started on teenagers -- they are beginning the important and difficult work of separating from their parents, so just breathe through those years and don’t take anything personally!  

In yoga, we salute the Light in each other, acknowledging that we are all part of the same Light.  We do our best not to judge.  We remind ourselves that the person with the perfect Trkonasana is not better than her neighbor using three blocks and a strap to set her pose; they are two people in different places.  Feeling the connection, knowing that we are each a part of the other, will foster a feeling of peace and love toward all.  And it will help you feel better, too.  Aren’t we all searching for Love, Peace, and Joy?  Where else can these be found, but in each other.

Happy New Year!

So many exciting things are happening in our world these days.  Some of them are exciting in a good way, and some not so great. Climate change and political unrest are daunting challenges to overcome, but innovations in technology and space exploration give much hope for the future.  How do we keep our equilibrium during these times of rapid change?  By balancing the spin with stillness.

Yes, I am talking about meditation.  No, don’t stop reading now because you think meditation is either too hard, too time consuming, or too wacky.  Once you find a meditation style that works for you, it becomes a simple, relatively quick way to be your best self.

There are so many different ways to meditate, so don’t be daunted by thinking you have to sit in lotus position for an hour, or chant mantras and count beads.  At the same time, don’t immediately throw out the idea of chanting mantras or counting beads; that might be your best way of meditating!

A great way to learn to meditate is by taking a class or joining a group meditation, but you can also take advantage of the bazillions of sites on the internet and YouTube.  Search a particular style of meditation that you have heard of (Buddhist meditation, walking meditation) or check out the websites of some of the biggies (Deepak Chopra or the Silva Method).  Or just type in “how to meditate” and see what comes up.

Meditation is a skill that must be learned, so just like when you started your yoga practice or worked up to the Boston Marathon, you start where you are and go from there.  Make it a priority for 2012.  Om shanti. Peace.

Time is on Your Side!

Do you have time to read a bit more about Time?  Last week I blithely said that yes, you have enough time, and I truly meant it.  There is enough time in life to do what is important.  There may not be enough time to get home from work and feed your kid a healthy, home-cooked meal before soccer practice, but there is time to nurture, love, and teach that same kid through childhood.  Some things have to fall by the wayside, and it is up to you to decide how to spend your time.

And notice how we use “no time” as an excuse:  When a friend calls asking for help with the school fashion show and you cannot think of anything more tortuous, you will beg off, saying “Oh, I simply don’t have the time.”  A moment later the phone rings again and you are asked to help with the animal shelter’s adoption drive.  Oh, those cute kittens! All of a sudden Time reappears and you eagerly say “yes”.   Hmmm, interesting.  Is it true that you don’t have time to vacuum the house (reoccurring theme for me, you can tell that’s an issue in this house!), or is it that you would rather read a magazine?  Do you really not have time to help out with the Girl Scout Cookie Sale, or do you just not want to?  

Time is getting a bad rap, being used as a scapegoat for getting out of unpleasant tasks.  Leave Time alone!  It knows how to get the job done and doesn’t appreciate being bullied.  There is enough time.  You just have to learn how to get along with it. 

Time's a'Wasting!

Someone recently asked me to do something because she didn’t have time to do one more thing.  Her calendar was full and her stress level was building.  I had the feeling she thought that since I didn’t clock in at an office every day, I had loads of time.  I said yes and did the task right away so I wouldn’t have to think about it.  It ended up taking me about an hour, and I learned a new computer skill along the way.  Time well spent.

No one has enough time.  There is no such thing as spare time.  We have to make a concerted effort to afford ourselves some leisure time.  Time is speeding up and we are racing to keep pace.  The clock is ticking!

Holy Minute Hand, Batman!  Let’s use one of our precious moments to take a deep breath.  I’m about to give you an early Christmas present:  You have enough time.  Take a look at your yesterday.  You had a list of things to do and you got some of them done.  Or you got all of them done.  Or you got none of them done.  But the time was there for your use, in any way you chose.  If you didn’t vacuum the house because your neighbor dropped by for a cup of tea, you had time for your neighbor.  If you accomplished every task on your list then dropped exhausted on the couch in the evening, there was time for that, too. 

Time may be limited, but every second is there for the taking.  And there is enough.  Take the time to help your neighbor.  Take the time for a quick nap.  Yes, there are deadlines and while you can always vacuum tomorrow, you still have to get your kids fed and to the practice field on time tonight; but don’t make Time your enemy.  Get to work on time and don’t waste time (is that even possible?) and take your time.  And breathe and smile and check off your list.  Or not.

"Fletcher" Thanksgiving Prayer

A Word for Our Sponsor

We gather, squished, around this table

With wine and turkey and mashed potato.

The kids squeeze their knees under tables too small

But that’s what we need to fit us all!

We’re thankful each year for our health and our food,

For our jobs and our Mom and our mostly tall brood.

We are grateful for love and for chocolate and pie.

We give thanks for our cats and the sun in the sky.

We are thankful for yoga and berries and shoes.

We’re grateful for gardens and road cleaning crews.

We are grateful for snow blowers, shovels and gloves.

We give thanks every month for the full moon above.

We like to go walking so thanks for fresh air.

We are grateful for rain and for weather that’s fair.

We give thanks for our poodles, retrievers and Sport,

We give thanks for whipped cream and warm apple torte.

We gather around and give thanks for this feast

For veggies and gravy; and last but not least

Our family so dear, so large and so hungry.

Thanks for bounty. Thanks for the plenty.